Raymond DeSalvo

So much to say about our beloved brother, Raymond. For many of you who knew him, you knew he was one of a kind. He beat stage 4 cancer. He beat COVID 19 3 times ( twice while he was undergoing chemotherapy and his immune system was at its worst.) He beat drug addiction many years ago. And 5 1/2 years ago he beat alcoholism. And recently, a current brain tumor. And yet, he smiled and laughed and joked and helped and called to check-In on how we were doing. I have been inundated ( in the best way possible ) since he has passed by phone calls and texts from friends of his and fellow members of his large AA community; sharing that he has helped them overcome their own demons of addiction, has brought them to AA meetings, has run many impactful meetings himself, has become other people’s sponsor and helped to change the course of their lives. It is overwhelmingly beautiful. For sure, our brothers significant suffering was meant for him to have compassion for other sufferers and to help them in any way he could on their path to recovery. We will never know exactly why someone is given so many crosses to bear in this life, but Ray certainly taught us all patience, compassion, remarkable resilience, unconditional love, sacrifice and yes, forgiveness. And he helped many others along the way. All of us who loved and cherished him will carry these memories and learnings forever and in that way, Ray Desalvo never dies. He lives in the best of each of us. His children were his pride and joy and were the main reason he struggled to overcome everything thrown at him and why he truly had 9 lives!! ( Our family often jokes that he has more like 13 lives at this point 😳🥰) A lesser man could never have survived all he has endured. And he not only survived, but thrived these last five years! Physicians have always remarked that he had an unusually strong constitution. I call him a warrior. And he has inspired me so many times throughout my life. And yes, Ray would LOVE that I am saying all of this about him!! Never one to have a small ego. Haha Every word is true. And more. He loves his children and each sibling fiercely and had a big protective instinct. His biggest regret in life was that during his years of chemical dependency, he was unable to be the father that Dylan and Jessica deserved. He could never forgive himself for that. During the final hours of his life , both myself and his daughter were present and we assured him that he is forgiven and that he is surrounded by love and God’s Grace. Yes, there is much healing to be done and we all will miss him terribly. But his strong spirit lives on and we know we will hear him in the wind, feel him in the ocean waves ( that he loved) and remember him as his son plays his drums, works so hard like his dad, and daughter shows us every strong and beautiful trait of his that she know she possesses; her fierce determination and sharp mind. You Jessica Marie and Dylan DeSalvo are his biggest achievement and lasting legacy. Thank you for being the light of his life and always giving him a reason to go on. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ I love you brother Ray. Thanks for being my big brother, many times my protector, my inspiration, and for teaching me so much about the power of unconditional love and forgiveness. You were a force to be reckoned with here on this earth. Go get ‘Em on the other side. Shoot some hoops with dad, hug Tony and Aunt Ronnie for us and join your friend Kathleen now as you become an angel. Rest in peace my beautiful brother. 🥲🥲❤️❤️🙏🙏

Raymond DeSalvo

April 18, 1960 - November 9, 2023